This week has been hard. I'm not sure if our minds and hearts are just ready to be home (we have 8 weeks left until furlough), or if the 16+ hour power outages
each day are taking its toll on us. We've had power for an average of 3 hours per day since Sunday (it does come on while we're sleeping and yes, I've been up at 2:30 am washing clothes). And the times when we do have that power differ each day. So we have to be ready at a moment's notice to cook, wash clothes, charge batteries, jump in the shower (because living at an orphanage with 65 other people causes our reserve tank of water to drain pretty quickly), etc. Night time is the hardest. Usually by that time the power has been off for 14 hours already and now the kids need baths, food, and bed so Mommy can settle down and get some relaxation. It's hard to do with no lights, water, or power. No rest for the weary. Rumors are vague as to how long this power shut down will last. Escom is working on one of their generators. Some say two weeks, some say until December. It's Malawi, so you never know.
But God has taught me a few hard lessons through this week.
1) Patience. No, I did NOT pray to be taught this lesson. But God is working with me on this in a major way! Some days are better than others. But living in Malawi you HAVE to have patience or you'll go crazy. It's something that can't be explained. You just have to experience it here.
2) Peace. I have some moments of peace and some moments of complete melt down. Those moments can be hours or even seconds apart. One minute I'm ok and the next I'm crying on the floor of my bathroom. But I'm getting there. God's not through with me yet.
3) Joy. Now please don't think that I've been all smiles and cheery this week. Far from it. I've pouted, I've griped, I've whined, I've cried. Yep....I sound like my kids! But I've also come full circle to see the joy in my circumstances. Last night my kids managed to have baths and a hot supper thanks to a few minutes of generator time. JOY! And they sat around in the candlelight coloring in their coloring books as they waited for bed time. JOY! We all pull together and work very hard to get everything done that we can while we have power. Teamwork! JOY!
4) Self control. Even when my insides are screaming for justice....I mean we DESERVE power all the time, right? Even when I want to fall on the ground kicking and screaming after the power goes out just as my corn bread goes in the oven....I can't let my kids see that. I have to smile and figure out a way to not let my emotions get the best of me. Poor Jeremy, I still need a little more self control around him since the second the door closes I let all my frustrations and emotions out on him. I'm thankful he just sits there and listens. He doesn't judge or lecture. He's pretty amazing. But I'm learning. Pongono-pongono (little by little).
5) Faithfulness. God is there! He's right beside me. When I'm so tired I can't move, I ask for His strength. When I'm so angry I can't see straight, He's right there taking over my emotions. When I'm sad and homesick, missing the conveniences that so many of my friends and family have (like power, water, and Chick-fil-A) He's there to remind me that I can do this. His strength is real. His love is powerful. And His faithfulness is all I need.
Wait, that list up there looks oddly familiar. See, we've been working very hard with the kids on showing and demonstrating the Fruits of the Spirit. Galatians 5:22-23 says,
"but the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control..." We even have a tree up in our living room that the kids can put a sticker on when I notice evidence of fruit in their lives. Apparently my teaching needed to be more aimed at myself. The Lord has shown me that I am the one who needed to be reminded to bear fruit.
So now we have figured out a few things. We cook mid-morning and have our meals lined up waiting to go into the oven when the power comes on. We gather our clothes and have them in the wash and ready to turn the washer on. We bathe and eat no matter what time of day it is. If there's water and hot food then it's time to take advantage. But mostly I've learned to be thankful for this
simple trial! Simple! So many of my friends are going through life threatening illnesses, children in the hospital, death among their family. There is so much hurt and pain in the world. I'm thankful that I've been given this trial at this time. When I put it into perspective I realize that complaining over no power is NOTHING compared to some of the hurt and pain that others are experiencing. God has shown me this:
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." - James 1:2-4
To God be the glory! And bring on the power outages Escom! I'm ready!
This morning AJ and I made up a bunch of food to have ready to put in the over once the power came back. Bread rolls, cinnamon rolls, cheese garlic bread, and chocolate chip cookies to name a few. Be prepared!
Dishes waiting to be washed when we get water back.
A list of things to do (because I tend to get anxious and forget) when power is back.
AJ figuring out how to spend the quiet peaceful time.
Our Fruit of the Spirit tree. Artistically it's very sad. But the kids love it. I guess I need a tree of my own. ;)